expectations influence behavior

Expectations

There’s nothing like an eclipse to remind you of your place in the universe.

A week before the event my husband decided we had to go see it. There was no plan in place.

Immediately, I panicked. I get phobic when he drives, and I sit right seat in heavy traffic on the freeway. I think it’s the lack of being in control and relying on others to make sensible driving choices. Terrifies me.

Whatever. And, it makes my husband crazy when I helpfully point out traffic conditions he might miss.

Meanwhile, the media (Good bless them) were warning of huge crowds. They were reporting on hospitals beefing up emergency rooms, stores adding extra stock, the police department preparing for problems, and making us aware in solemn tones of all that could go wrong. A good friend confided that they were getting up at 3:00 a.m. Saturday morning, packing food, and taking the back roads to avoid the congestion. I was on the edge of deciding to stay home and let husband go on his own.

Expectations influence behavior.

Hearing about all the emergency preparations and the dire predictions of chaos amped up my already bubbling worries. But I wasn’t ready to get up at 3:00 a.m three days ahead of the event.

Enter fate.

Over a garbage can, my neighbor invited us to join them at their place on the coast in Pacific City.

Wahoo! A plan. My husband agreed. He never lost his confidence in the belief that everything would work out fine.

Expectations.

We needed eclipse glasses. So Thursday evening we went on a hunt. Let me tell you, the whole area was out. After an hour and a half of driving all around, we gave up. “We really don’t need them,” he said.

What? Seriously?

I called up my neighbor to plan the food and told her about our expedition. She informed me they had four pair at the house. Not to worry. Silly me.

We agreed to leave around seven o’clock Saturday morning to beat the traffic. I packed everything the night before except last minute stuff, even showered then.

That’s when husband mentioned that he wanted to stop and play golf near Lincoln City. We’d go to the Outlet Mall there, plug into their EV supercharger, and shop around while the car juiced up. Then he discovered a five star restaurant across from the golf course that served breakfast and added that into the itinerary.

Adaptable. Sometimes a wife and writer needs to stay adaptable. However, I noticed that my anxiety was turning into anticipation. As I saw an exciting plan falling into place, my expectations soared upward. Anxiety got put on the back burner.

As we all know now, there was no traffic. We finally left after 8:00 a.m. I was munching calmly on a muffin and gulping down coffee. The traffic was light, the trip beautiful. The GPS shows green all the way…even through Dundee. A miracle was in place.

Near Lincoln City, we stopped at a gem of a place called the Wildflower Grill, which I fervently recommend. Then on to the mall with over a hundred miles still available. Eight open EV charging stalls, we picked one (I had worried they would all be filled) and we went shopping. I found an awesome deal on a needed item, so did husband, and a half hour later we were on our way to the golf links, tank filled to two hundred miles. No range anxiety whatsoever.

Chinook Winds Golf Course was beautiful, and my husband flashed a coupon booklet that let him play golf with a cart for fifteen dollars. He had reserved a tee time, and I could drive along. Needless to say, it worked out great. He could have used a few more birdies, but whatever.

At three o’clock, I called to let out hosts know we were ahead of schedule and on our way. The drive up the coast was spectacular. Their house was jaw-droppingly beautiful and perched high on a ridge overlooking the town. Five star accommodations.

My head was spinning. I took pictures. We got along wonderfully. The men were both tech geeks that found common ground and similar interests. The next day we toured the town, walked the beach, supported a local winery, and enjoyed a beautiful sunset from the deck. They were perfect hosts.

Needless to say, it was a memorable trip. There were several telescopes with filters, and yes, eclipse glasses so we could observe the whole process. Our worries over a looming marine layer eased as the sun broke through before ten o’clock.

What did I learn?

Expectations….doubts and worries… can block you from a worthwhile experience. Writers and authors need to know this. They need to put aside their fears of failure, and like my husband, plunge into the experience, developing a strategy as they go. Adaptability is key. As events unfolded, he researched ways to increase the value of the event, adding on to the developing plan.

Authors can do the same. Write a story. Research the business. Create a novel. Add in a paperback or ebook, maybe audio. Look into marketing. Trust that if you move forward, opportunities will present themselves. Take advantage of them. A signing, a speaking engagement, a book club.

There will be naysayers….maybe among your own family. Evaluate their comments thoughtfully. Then keep moving ahead, adjusting as you go. It’s a journey. Yes, there’s traffic, and, yes, bumps in the road. But it may be a life changing experience.

As I stared at the eclipse, I realized how powerful the universe was, and I was a mere speck in it. But all around me were other specks, in the town, on the ridge, who roared when the sun vanished.